and the days feel like years

Tuesday, March 29, 2005*

i seriously dun understand the way u think. u fucking have the jersey that we said we wanted as class tee n we did say to ask the class whether they wanted it then y cant u fucking bring it to show it to them? ya so u bought it aft we said we agreed that it was wat we wanted but then if u bought it juz for that then y cant u fucking bring it? y muz u wait till nico showed the shirt she prefered then show urs? u say u havent washed it yet but y the fuck muz u wash the shirt before u show ppl? i mean ppl will hold it up n if u wanna wash aft that fine. but before u show ppl the shirt u wanna wash? for wat fucking reason? u scared it's be too dirty for ppl to hold up n look at it?

ok quite unlikely u'd buy it juz to show the class. but rmb last yr? i was the one who listened to u rant n 'gush' about the jersey n i agreed that it was nice. n rmb u said that if it wasnt gonna be class tee then we wld buy it ourselves? aft that i said i didnt wanna buy it anymore cuz i didnt have enuf money but u still kept telling me that the jersey's fucking nice. i did tell u to buy it since u liked it so much but u didnt. now, look wat u've done, u bought it. y? was it someone who told u to buy it since u liked it? if that's the reason then it fucking shows wat my word means/meant to u. also, being the one who had to listen to u talk about the jersey everytime the subject of class tee came about n the first one to actually see this jersey with u, wldnt it be apporpriate for me to be the first to know? we even planned to get the jersey if there wasnt gonna be a class tee u know. say im asking for too much but issit so fucking difficult to say 'hey, i bought the black and white jersey'? there were so many times during the last week that u cld've said it loh. it's not like i wldnt listen to wat u were saying. n juz now when i asked u bout taking photo of it u cld've fucking mentioned it. not say something bout nico having a pic of another one she prefered. i dun fucking care wat she wants. all she wants is nike nike nike. n majority of the class dun wan that. so shut the fuck up abt her n the fucking jersey she likes.

im really sorry bout the swearing but im seriously damn pissed and frustrated. i really dunno how to tell u this but i feel like im nothing but shit to u now. i feel like im not being treated the like way i shld be. esp considering wat happened. i feel like im being placed below the ppl u once didnt like, the ones u used to complain about.

bloody bloody pissed. but it'll be over by tmr. nites~

~8:51 pm