the day passes by.
the light, like an invisible shield,
preventing the inky darkness
from swallowing me.

but then the defences begin to fall away,
each second, each minute, each hour,
and night creeps in.
like a predator stalking its prey.

the thoughts fill my mind,
dragging me closer and closer
to the darkened pit.

suddenly i find myself falling,
for what seems like
the longest time,
then hitting the bottom.

there, all i can think of
is to find a way out,
my mind creating more chaos
as each minute passes.

and finally,
when i'm too tired to find a way out,
i lie down
and allow the darkness to surround me.

then i wake up
and think to myself,
maybe that was just a bad dream.

i dunno what i'm typing. guess it's what i'm feeling now..

it's getting torturous, feeling this way. i know i shldnt think abt it so much. but really, that's easier said than done. doing work isnt helping either.

hmm..
______

everytime i talk to u, i miss u more and more. i wish the weekends were longer and the time passed slower. but i wld never wish for u to stay at home everytime so that we cld talk. u have ur life. and it's not like we're whatever.

okay. it's time to stop thinking abt it, charlene leck yan jun.
______

anyway, abt shopping yesterday.

went to one of the shopping centres in the city for abit of late night shopping. haha. looked for stuff to buy back. saw a pale yellow skirt at one of the shops on thurs at another shopping centre near sch. went to the city hoping that they had it on sale. but they didnt even have it. hmm..not sure if i wanna get it or not. saw a long sleeved yellow and black striped shirt. it's 2 for $30 normally but the other colours arent that nice.

melissa drove there so we got to the city pretty fast. was sitting in the back on the left side when i happened to turn to the right and saw this HUGE insect that had a red head and super long black body with 2 tails at the back. i was so damn freaked out. usually i dont get that freaked out by insects but it's a different story when insects are in cars. cuz in cars they have less space to crawl to and u have less space to move to to get away from them. anyway, tracy sitting in front gave me tissue paper to kill it. i've never been freaked out this much by an insect in a car before. and it kept crawling abit by abit towards me. freaky man.

okay, out of point alr. so we were walking arnd. aft walking in and out of a few shops without seeing anything, tracy started saying it'll be damn sad if we came all the way to the city and didnt get anything. haha. so we kept looking out for something to buy. went into one of the surf shops and tracy saw this roxy bag with fake snake/croc print on it. they had pink, silver and black. haha. i liked the silver one but melissa didnt like all. haha. but in the end tracy bought the silver. haha. then she bought a belt too. she wanted to get a shirt for her bf but he didnt call her back so she didnt buy. haha. melissa bought a tube top for herself and a purple formal shirt for her gf. she wanted to get a green and white nike shirt with fuzzy stuff on it. haha. but the gf alr got. haha. then i got a brown bikini (S$24. cld've got it for half the price cuz the salesgirl only scanned in the barcode for the bottoms but i was being a good girl and told the salesgirl she forgot to scan the top. haha.) and a small silver wallet (damn cheap, S$2.40. haha).

melissa and i saw this green and white nike jacket that was damn nice hanging there (shld've taken a pic cuz i cant find it online!). but when we tried it it looked ok only. we were thinking of buying it. only abt 60singapore dollars lah. but in the end didnt get it.

went to some chinese food court aft that for dinner. had beef kway teow and mee goreng. haha. the mee goreng had no chilli at all!! but was quite jelat aft that cuz it was quite oily. nearly felt like puking.

reached home at abt 9plus. and a headache started aft that. lol.

so that's the shopping trip.
______

now off to do the report on the presentation i had this wed. got meeting again tmr. sigh. kinda want it to be cancelled so i dont have to go to sch on a sunday. but then if she cancels it she'll probably call me to tell me and then i'll be wide awake and cant get back to slp. sighh..

anyway, it's a super long entry. haha. i commend u if u've continued reading all the way to the end.
______

abt 40days left till i'm home!!

ciao~

~8:48 pm