it's coming closer and closer to the time i have to leave. it feels weird leaving again, after being back here for almost 3months. it almost seems like i never went there in the first place. sigh, sometimes i really wish i could tell the future. then i would have been able to predict that i didnt have to go there, and maybe everything would have turned out differently.

anyway, been going out quite often this last week. here's a recap.

12th feb, monday
went to town with hL before her school started in the afternoon. walked around far east and heeren. only bought a shirt from queen's couture.

13th feb, tuesday
stayed home and slacked. started to pack a little. but really felt lazy so nothing much was done.

14th feb, wednesday
met some first 3months classmates for dinner. went to breko at holland village. not bad not bad. the burger is really huge. tim's treat (:(: despite it being valentine's day, which could have turned out pretty depressing, it was a really fun night. though something did happen later on that made it kinda suck. made me realise why to some people valentine's can be the most depressing day of the year.

15th feb, thursday
met hL again in the evening. decided to take a bus down because i was kinda lazy to walk to the train station. didnt know that there would be a jam along clementi dover and buona vista. so i was like half an hour late. ate chicken scallopini at spag then went to far east to get our shoes. was kinda late by then but decided to go espirit at wisma to get another shirt for cny. the brown one from queen's couture was kinda dull. got a pale yellow shirt then went home.

16th feb, friday
slacked around the whold day. waited around for a friend to msg because we were supposed to meet. finally went out of the house at 9plus at night. parents weren't too happy but i couldn't really be bothered. once im back in aus there's no way i can be out at 9plus at night. so yea, was supposed to be in town at 10, but the atm queue was kinda long so reached at around 1030. by then was super hungry but we couldn't decide what to eat. walked around aimlessly for about 10-15mins. decided to watch a movie after dinner/supper so went to cine to look at the times. all the earlier ones were full so decided to go ps to watch. ate at the pastamania at cine. one piece of garlic bread, lasagne and a few slices of pizza. haha. super full after that. took a slow walk to ps and decided to watch ghost rider at 145am. shared a nacho combo even though we were so full. haha. the cinema was freaking cold lah. and we were sitting on the 3rd row from the front because there was no more space at the back. anyway, nice movie. recommended (: shared a cab back after the movie and reached home at 5am. went to bed at 6am.

17th feb, saturday
woke up at 1130 to go for reunion lunch. havent slept that little since i was in jc. anyway, food for lunch was alright. nothing fantastic. went home for awhile then went for reunion dinner. steamboat. usual stuff. came back and now my eyes are gonna close.
______

i really dont know what to do. i wanna wait but at the same time, i dont know how long i can wait. i wanna say something but at the same time, i'm afraid that if i do things will get awkward. i really want to ask but at the same time, i'm afraid of the answer u'll give. so tell me, what would you do? tell me what u feel. tell me what u think. please, just tell me. because it's really starting to hurt, with all the mixed signals that u give.

or am i just thinking/expecting too much?

nights~

~2:56 am